Nuclear family is the closest family - a husband with wife and children if they have any. If we mention their fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers we will define them as separate units, usually living in separate households. But the nuclear family is the basic family. We can call nuclear family two people living together even they are not married.
Traditional family is in minds of a lot of people as father, mother and children living in a flat or a home. But it has changed a lot in last 30 years.
In the 1960´s 70% of households were the "classic family" - a husband, the breadwinner, a wife (the one who took care of the children and didn´t work outside the home) and 2 children under the age of 18. But today this type of "classic family" is only in 10% of all families. In additional 20% of households there were both working parents and one or more children under the age of 18 living at home.
That means that only about 1/3 of households consists of two parents and their children. The remaining households are married couples without children, single mothers and their children, unmarried couples and others living together, and people living alone.
Today it is very hard to find a good person and to be sure that he or she is forever. Marriages are not arranged in civilized countries today - young people have freedom in choosing their future husbands and wifes but it is very difficult as well. They have to find their husband or wife on their own and they make a lot of mistakes. One out of every two marriages now ends in divorce. Lot of couples live together for few years to know well each other , to find good or bad habbits and than finally marry or not. Most people think that unhappy couples shouldn´t stay together just because they have children at home. Children may be better off living with one parent than with two who are constantly arguing.
But divorced people still look for love, safety and understanding, then for father or mother for their children.They can marry another divorced person and then they have blended or step family. Adults should be careful about children at that time, because children are very sensitive on strange persons, new fathers, mothers, new siblings... We can see sibling rivalry not only in blended families, it is very often in families with 2 children when the one is much older than the other, the worse is the difference 5 years. My opinion is that children learn how to behave to their siblings from their parent´s behaviour.
In the past it was very unusuall for woman to have a child alone without any husband. She had to live with bad reputation even if she hadn´t done anything bad. Today´s women can have children alone with any problems, they can work and take care about their children and nobody thinks that this is strange.
The problem of having children or not is one of the biggest problems of today´s family life. There are 2 main reasons: the couple doesn´t want to have any children or the couple can´t have children.
People who don´t want to have children can have many reasons why. Some of them live in very poor conditions and they will not be able to take care about child. Some couples don´t want to have their own child and they decide to adopt some from children´s house or from abroad, for example Asia or Africa. Why to have their own children when so many children are without any parents and they suffer from singleness.
Another big problem is that people want to have their own children but they can´t because of some injury or illness. Today´s people are under the stress more than in the past, they breathe smog air and live in polluted cities, eat unhealthy food... Women are in very stresfull situation , because they don´t have enough time and strenght to bring children all their life.
People usually decide to have only one child - it avoids problems with rivalry between siblings. But this way of thinking is typicall for western world, for example in China the family is the most important institution and parents try to have many children because there is nobody else to take care of them when they will become old. China has now more than 1 milliard inhabitans and the government support families with only 2 children or less.
Another family problem is called fast-track parents. These parents don´t have enough time for their children and they work all day. They are busy workoholics, then feel sorry and buy then a lot of presents for their children. That´s why many children of rich businessmen take drugs and have problems with criminality - they want to have attention.
People are living longer after their children are grown up and they often end up alone. They can live in a special houses for retired people. These houses are with medical care and social programs. Retired people can find new friends there. But most of them feel alone and far away from their family. We should have more sense and stop to be selfish.
Should parents decide their children´s future?
In the past parents were used to decide which school will their child study, what sort of clothes will he/she wear, which fiends will he/she have, which boy/girlfriend will he/she have and who will he/she marry and live. Parents were the power and their word was as a stone. But the tima has changed and the choice is up to children. I think that parents should give advices but not order what should their children do or not. Because everybody learns from own mistakes.
The role of the family brings to the members love, understanding, safety and example how to solve problems and how to behave and go on with other people in society.
Parents show their children which role has man and which has woman. Man can be the head of the family and the woman just executor of husbands wishies. Or the parents respect each other and acknowledge democracy in family life.
The parents choose the school and the sort of education for their children when tey are young. If they make a good choice and support their children in it´s hobbies and priorities, their choice can bring nice, clever and indipendent people to our society.
My nuclear family has four members - my mother, father, brother and me. My parents live separately, I live with my mother and my younger brother lives with my father. We see each other quite often and spend weekends together. I have qiute big family because both my uncles have divorced and married again. So I have 7 cousins together. The oldest is 24 and the youngest is just 2. I like them very much and we see very often and spend holidays together.
In my future family I want to have my own children and maybe I will adopt some as well, I want to live in a house with big garden.But first I want to make up good background for my future life and family.
10. srpen 2008